More bullshit from another asshole with a blog

Goddammit!
30Dec07

Posted by wafwot

Cheaties - The Breakfast of Cheaters Woopty fucking doo. The New England Patriots finished the 2007 season undefeated; only the third team in NFL history to do so. Before we all get giddy and vote Mr. Belicheat coach of the year, or Shady Brady athlete of the year, remember they were caught cheating! They are cheaters and will always be cheaters! Cheaters shouldn’t be rewarded!

On top of that, they’re not the greatest team ever, no matter how much ass felching Madden, Collinsworth, Michaels, Buck, ad nauseam, does. The Colts in week 9, Eagles in week 12, Ravens in week 13, and Giants this weekend showed that the Patriots can be beat. The Giants played a really good game Saturday. Did you watch it? Fuck, it was simulcast on three networks like a goddamn Presidential speech, and had six hours of pre-game coverage (no kidding) on the NFL Network! That matches the longest-ever pre-game coverage of a Super Bowl game! Collinsworth and Gumble were fawning all over themselves, clearly biased towards New England. You could almost hear their gagging as they gobbled up Brady’s cock and caressed his coin purse like a five-hundred dollar whore. I so wish I could have muted the television and listened to a New York radio broadcast. Everyone in broadcasting and the NFL brass wanted New England to go undefeated for the season. Most fans wanted to see justice for spygate. The almighty dollar wins again. I’m hoping they suffer a meltdown in the playoffs; the Patriots are due for a loss…

On a completely different subject, but one that still pisses me off, is Washington State’s new cell phone laws. During the holidaze, the WSP has been running television ads about drunk driving and seat belt, calling it their “emphasis patrol,” which is a politically correct way of saying “you will comply or we’ll rape your ass.” I’ve ranted about seat belts before, so I won’t cover it again. This time I’m peeved at the incongruity of the State in which I live. A new cell phone law, RCW 46.61.668, which goes into effect January 1, 2008, states that you can only be busted for text messaging as a secondary offense. This means that you have to be breaking some other traffic law before you can be fined for text messaging. This is completely stupid when you compare it to the seat belt law which is a primary offense. Somehow, the State feel that text messaging isn’t serious enough to make you stop doing it, unless you kill someone… then they’ll only fine you $124. How can Washington make text messaging a secondary infraction, but putting your arm around someone while driving or not wearing a seat belt a primary infraction? The logic escapes me! I personally watched a woman text messaging in stop and go traffic roll right into the back of another car on Interstate 5. LDriver and I busted up laughing because we watched the whole thing happen. I even directed LDriver’s attention to the impending incident as the woman was coasting; “Hey, watch this… {crunch}”

Let’s put this in perspective, shall we? If you’re not wearing a seat belt, which is not putting anyone in harm’s way, you can be pulled over and fined $124 in Washington State. However, some teenage twat, continually taking her eyes off the road and risking the lives of everyone in her immediate area of the highway (in both directions) while she text messages her slutty girlfriends about Ryan Seacrest, or some such shit, is perfectly acceptable? Great googly-moogly, man! How does that make sense to anyone? Only if Miss Snottybitch is going too fast, or swerving in her lane, or not indicating a turn will she be pulled over, then she be ticketed for both infractions. Yeah. This makes total fucking sense. Thank you RCW 46.61.668, I feel safer now. U R my BBF, LOL.

Even Washington’s new hands-free law (effective July 1, 2008) is a secondary infraction. Why is the harmless act of not wearing a seat belt a primary offense, but threatening the lives of others with a Scion xB hurling down the highway at seventy miles an hour, with a Hello Kitty cell phone glued to your head a secondary offense? Stupid retarded lawmakers. Maybe if Governor Mudcutter's Continental gets broadsided by some jackoff on a cell phone both new laws will be changed to primary infractions.

This very blog update is the 28th update in 2007, and the 158th since January of 2005. Actually, there were a few updates in late 2004, but when I upgraded to WordPress, I left the 2004 updates out. This is probably the longest and most active my domain name has ever been in its 10 years. It started out as a cock-waving novelty. In 1997, not many people had real domain names for their home page. Most were stuck with a home page at theirisp.com/~username. Having your very own domain name roxx0r3d, and was an indication of your l33tness! Okay… maybe that was all in my head.

I was working at an ISP (Galaxynet) at the time, and hosted wafwot.com on their servers. I eventually moved the domain name to its own dedicated server at Galaxynet before moving it to a hosting company in Florida, a virtual private server (VPS) in Renton, and finally a VPS in Seattle. Now I own wafwot.net and wafwot.org, along with wafwot.mobi and several other domain names.

Yes, wafwot.com turned 10 years old this month. I registered it on December 17, 1997, back when the only domain name registrar around was Network Solutions and domain names cost $35 per year. Today, Network Solutions still exists, but there are almost 900 different domain name registrars and domain names can be as low as $5 per year. This got me to thinking about how far things have come since I registered wafwot.com.

Microsoft Internet Exploder 4 and Netscape Communicator 4 were in a browser war, and Windows 95 was the OS that most of us used. Windows 98 was only in beta testing in December 1997, and my i486DX-33 was running OS/2 Warp 4 for the “superior” multitasking capabilities. Yes, I hated Windows even in 1997.

Speaking of wars, modems were king of Internet connectivity in 1997 (for consumers), and USRobotics and Rockwell/Lucent were in a battle to break the 33.6k barrier and deliver 56k speeds over a copper phone line. I was running a Bulletin Board System (which is why I ran OS/2 Warp) in 1997 on that old i486DX with a 33.6k modem. The fastest CPU available was the Intel Pentium II, which ran at a blistering 300 MHz, and an 8MB x 32bit SIMM of EDO memory was over $100. Those were the good ol’ days!

Many people had no idea what an MP3 was in 1997, but thanks to a new program called Winamp, we all learned quickly. No one knew what an iPod was, and in fact, Apple was in serious financial trouble in 1997 before Steve Jobs stepped (back) in to save their happy gay rainbow ass… and look at what the MP3 did for Apple!

There’s plenty more Internet and computer history from 1997, but I’m tired of typing, and should actually go to sleep. Four in the morning is only six hours away. I’ll Wikify this nonsense at work, which better be a short day. If you remember your computer or the Internet from 1997, tell me about it in the comments section. See ya next year!

Once a cheater…
23Sep07

Posted by wafwot

Mr. Fourth Quarter my ass!I’ll bet you thought I was going to write about something else when you saw that subject, eh? Nope. I’m talking about football. Finally! No more baseball, no more Mojo Rising. No more golf, no more FedEx Cup standings. It’s time for football, bitches! Finally!

Of course, the season was full of distractions before the Kickoff game even got underway. If you don’t know about Michael Vick and his dog fighting ring, where the fuck have you been? Go crawl back under your rock and stop reading my blog. Vick was suspended from the NFL indefinitely, pending the outcome of his court battle with the Federal Government and the state of Virginia. Good luck, Mike… you dog-killing, ass bandit motherfucker. I hope Goodell bans you from the NFL for life. You don’t deserve to play Madden NFL 07, let alone play in the NFL.

Then we have Wade Wilson, quarterback coach for the Dallas Cowboys who was busted for purchasing “medication — believed to be human growth hormone — that is banned under the League’s substance abuse policy.” Wilson’s punishment is a five game suspension and $100,000 fine. Ouch! Also, Tank Johnson of the Chicago Bears and Chris Henry of the Cincinnati Bengals were suspended for the first eight games of the season, without pay, for violating the League’s personal conduct policy.

Who else? Oh shit, Pacman Jones of the Tennessee Titans was suspended without pay for the entire season for, well, being a dick. The reasons are too numerous. TV commentators joke that Jones has more arrests than interceptions since being drafted in 2005… and that’s pretty fucking sad if you ask me.

There are others: Anthony Hargrove of the Buffalo Bills, Obafemi Ayanbadejo of the Chicago Bears, Ryan Tucker of the Cleveland Browns, Jarrod Cooper of the Oakland Raiders, Rodney Harrison of the New England Patriots, ad nauseam, have all been suspended four games for violating the League’s substance abuse policy. Every one of these overpaid, materialistic fuckers who were taking steroids should be called cheaters. They’re taking steroids to gain an advantage against their counterparts. No matter how you look at it, it’s cheating. Roger Goodell and the League have a hard four-game suspension if you pop positive on a whiz quiz. I think it should be stricter — suspension without pay for the season! But, when you have Major League Baseball that seems to permit steroids (fuck you, Bonds!), what are ya gonna do?

Speaking of cheating — and the Patriots — the biggest news and most controversial fine handed down by the NFL is the “punishment” of Bill Belichick and the Patriots for Spygate. On the first Sunday of the NFL season, the New York Jets tipped off NFL security that the Patriots were videotaping the Jets’ defensive signals. Four days laster, the League fined Belicheat $500,000 and the Patriots organization $250,000. The Patriots also have to forfeit a first round draft pick if they make the 2007 playoffs, or forfeit a second and third round pick if they fail to make the 2007 playoffs. The Belicheat fine was the maximum allowed fine the NFL could levy, and the biggest fine levied against a coach in the NFL’s 87-year history. But to a coach that’s rumored to make five million a year, is that really a punishment? Yeah, ten percent of my annual net income probably wouldn’t render me homeless, but it would hurt like a bitch. But to the NFL coach of the League’s “flagship” team which is owned by company with a net income of $1.3 billion (yes billion with a B), does the three quarters of a million dollar fine really hurt them? Allow me the opportunity to say, “Fuck no!”

Yeah, yeah. Whatever. All you bandwagon Patriots fans and Belicheat supporters out there can suck a big fat one. You discount the fact that the Patriots were cheating by reasoning “all teams in the NFL are cheating to some degree.” Maybe so, but the goddamn Patriots got caught with their hands in the VCR, motherfuckers, and they should be made an example of! You dumb-asses seem to forget the the Patriots were caught cheating in the same manner three times last season, twice in one game! How fucking blatant do you have to be? How long have they been cheating? Did cheating help them win Super Bowls? I believe it did, and I doubt you’ll ever change my mind on that belief! Did Belicheat think that because he’s the Bill Belichick of the almighty Patriots that he is immune from the League’s wrath? Fuck me, if you compare the punishment to the crime, apparently his is immune! That must be one magical fucking hoodie he wears on the sidelines. Wotta dick!

Others say the loss of a first round draft pick will hurt them a great deal. I also throw the yellow bullshit flag on that. To a team with a salary cap as large as New England’s, I seriously doubt the loss of a draft pick is going to slow them down much, if at all. The Patriots are already 3 and 0 this season — well on their way to the playoffs — and the only real penalty they’ll face is financial. Poor babies. I guess Bill and his gang of cheating steroid users will have to settle for the lesser model Cadillac… or claim a smaller charitable donation on their 2007 taxes. Hang on. Please excuse the delay while I wipe these crocodile tears from my eyes. Boo hoo.

I blame Commissioner Goodell for this injustice. Back in April of 2007, when he suspended Jones and Henry, he was quoted as saying, “We must protect the integrity of the NFL. The highest standards of conduct must be met by everyone in the NFL because it is a privilege to represent the NFL, not a right. These players, and all members of our league, have to make the right choices and decisions in their conduct on a consistent basis.” Yeah. Right. Okay. Did Goodell forget that he said this when he handed down his “punishment” to Belicheat and the Patriots? Somehow I think he did. What the fuck, Roj? Let’s see what he wrote in a letter to these players, who if you recall, were suspended for steroids or just being a punk-ass criminal. “Your conduct has brought embarrassment and ridicule upon yourself, your club, and the NFL, and has damaged the reputation of players throughout the league. You have put in jeopardy an otherwise promising NFL career, and have risked both your own safety and the safety of others through your off-field actions. In each of these respects, you have engaged in conduct detrimental to the NFL and failed to live up to the standards expected of NFL players. Taken as a whole, this conduct warrants significant sanction.” Wotta hypocritical load of shit! Being a gangsta hood off the field, or juicing “warrants significant sanctions,” yet cheating your way to three Super Bowls gets you a slap on the wrist? Bullshit, Mr. Goodell. Bull-fucking-shit, yo!

Belicheat should have been fined his half mil, he should have been suspended for the season for violating the League’s personal conduct policy, and motherfucker, he should lose ALL his first round draft picks. That would have been a truly severe penalty that would put an end to cheating by any other club that’s practicing the same tactics. If Goodell didn’t want to suspend Belicheat for violating the conduct policy, maybe a suspension for being a cocksucking cheater would have fit The Bill? Whatever the case, Goodell dropped the ball. The media, commentators, players, and fans across the League feel that the punishment is far too light for the crime that was committed. And, instead of making an example of Belicheat that would scare the fuck out of any other cheating team, Goodell has set a precedence. If you have half a million, go ahead and cheat, it’s okay. I’ll wager at least half the NFL coaches without a Super Bowl win would drop $500k in a New York second for a ring and trophy.

And I’ve completely used up all my time on one fucking rant. Keep your eyes peeled for another update before the end of September. I still have to tell you about that move I’ve been alluding to. The more I think about it, the madder I become…

Ribbons Suck!
03Oct05

Posted by wafwot

ribbon-based-economy.jpg This image was posted in our groupchat at work, and I totally agree! I’ve been saying this since March at least, and even have a blog entry to prove it! "Hey, I’m not sure if all you bandwagon patriots have noticed or not, but all the ribbons in the world won’t help shit. If you want to help the troops, give them something they want, like some armor for their vehicles or a trip fucking home. Slappin’ a magnet on your gas-guzzling SUV in the middle of a war for oil just makes you look like a GIANT PRICK." I want a shit brown-colored magnetic ribbon that says “Fuck you and your gas-guzzling SUV.”