More bullshit from another asshole with a blog

Naked Women Wash My Truck!
22Oct06

Posted by wafwot

dscf0293.jpg Fuck, I hate thinking up titles for blog entries. It’s never a problem when I’m writing about a single subject, but most of my updates recently have been covering multiple topics. So, I thought I would employ some kind of subject trickery, like spammers do, by making up some interesting topic that piques your interest. All it really does is obfuscate the real subject of the email, which is usually for some boner pills, off-shore pharmacutical web sites, phishing schemes, or next-to-no interest mortgage rates from nefarious Chinaman named Hu. For the love of ham, make it stop!

Okay, for the misleading subject, I’m sorry. But, would you have been excited to read the normal shit I write if the subject had been Some Crap on my Mind? Yeah, that’s what I thought.

This picture is of the windmill in City Beach Park here in Oak Harbor. I decided to start taking some pictures in and around Oak Harbor and place them into an Oak Harbor photo gallery as a rememberance of the 17+ years I’ve lived here. Click here for the gallery.

I’ll be adding more pictures as I take them. I’m going to try to take as many as I can with my six year old digital camera. I really should buy a new one sometime.

So, the search continues for a house in King County as we gather financial records and go through the pre-quaification process. On that note, I was watching John Ratzenberger's Made in America on the Travel Channel Saturday, and Cliff was touring the modular home factory of Silvercrest. Some of the homes they build are indistiguishable from stick-built homes, and look quite nice. This got me to thinking. If we’re going to go into debt for more than a quarter of a million dollars, maybe it would be nice to have a brand new home. Why should we buy someone elses problems? Why should we settle for someone elses cast-off home. The whole idea of old roofs, water damage, weak floors, toxic mold, someone elses dust mites, dead pets in the yard… it turns my sphnicter to granite. Preliminarily, it looks like it may even be cheaper than buying an existing home. We still have some homework to do. Jebus, this whole process is starting to get on my last nerve.

This coming week is our last week working in the Oak Harbor office. We have to pack our offices and disconnect our computers this Thursday so the moving company can come in and move our shit to the Seattle office on Friday. That means we get to work from home on Friday. Joy. I wonder how loud Angel will be when I’m trying to troubleshoot someone’s DSL circuit. “Okay, [squawk] I need [squawk] you to [squawk] power [squawk] cycle [squawk] — SHUT THE FUCK UP YOU WHITE PIECE OF SHIT! — your modem. [squawk squawk squawk]“ Should be about as fun as tweezing the hair off the balls of a kitten.

Starting on October 30, we’ll be working in the Seattle office. There are about six of us from Oak Harbor that will be carpooling to Seattle. The thought of commuting for five hours a day sound about as enjoyable as being raped by a Clydesdale without the benefit of lube. At least I’m not buring 18 gallons of unleaded per day in my truck. As of this Friday the 20th, the news from corporate was they are going to buy a company vehicle — a Dodge minivan — for us to make the commute in. While we’re at work, the van would be usable by the sales people to take clients to lunch, or the admins to make a run to one of the data centers. It should be fun to see who will be the first to bring the van back late, making the Oak Harbor people late for their soul-crushing commute back to the Island. Goddamn, I’m gonna hate it. This house buying/build shit needs to be kicked into a higher gear before I go insane.

Favorite time of the year
03Oct06

Posted by wafwot

10-02-06_0759.jpg Autumn is in the air, and I like it. I snapped this foggy photo with my phone yesterday at 8:00am. The nights are getting much cooler, making for foggy mornings, and yesterday was thick. It gave everything a Sleepy Hollow feel, but burned off by noon.

Summer was great, but the record-low rainfall, and all the sunshine gets monotonous. The rain and wind are welcome in my book. Pine trees are nice, but there’s definite lack of leaf trees in Washington. I’m from Pennsylvania, and I love when the leaves change colors. The air is crisp, the days are short, and the breeze blows the fallen leaves.

Speaking of Pennsylvania, I was reading someone’s blog during lunch today, and they were talking about toaster ovens. Odd, I know. Anyway, people were talking about how they use their toaster ovens. One person said they heat their hoagies in theirs. I thought this was even odder, since anyone who would use the term “hoagie” has to be from or is currently living on the East coast, specifically Pennsylvania. And if you know what a hoagie is, you should also know that if you broil or toast one in an oven, it’s no longer a hoagie. Toasting a hoagie magically turns it into a grinder. All this got me thinking about wanting some East coast sandwiches. The shit that pillow-biter Jared (he has aides) pedals is not even close to authentic. I’d eat turds from a cat litter box if I could wash it down with a real cheesesteak from D’alessandro’s and some Tastykakes. D’alessandro’s is in the Roxborough neighborhood of Philadelphia, and arguably makes the greatest cheesesteaks in all of Philly… dare I say the world?

The gears of relocation are in motion at work. The company wants everyone working in the Westin on October 30. So, in less than 3 weeks, I’ll be making the soul-crushing commute, along with 4 (or more) others from Oak Harbor. We’re trying to talk them into buying a minivan, which can also be used as a company vehicle while we’re at work. We’ll see what happens. I’m not holding my breath.

Tina and I continue looking for a house in the Seattle area as we gather financial records for the ass rape we’re about to go through. In fact, we have mortgage seminar to go to on Saturday. Can you believe I gotta go to school for this shit? I guess when you’re going into debt for a quarter of a million dollars or more, it’s a good idea to know what you’re doing. The seminar gets us a reach around during the ass rape. Simply excellent.

I still need to charge my digital camera and drive around taking pictures of Oak Harbor and Whidbey Island. I want to take some final pictures of the area to compare when I visit. I guess I still need a sunny day or two for that endeavor.

Risqué Pictures
23May06

Posted by wafwot

Hot Chick

So, I’ve been getting these sporadic pictures from this hot chick I know in Texas. Is “hot chick” okay to use? I’m not going to offend any uggos, am I? Fuck ‘em… no wait… to hell with ‘em if they take offense.

I keep trying to get her to send “better” pictures, but I think she’s shy… although, these are pretty good. I got a third from her, but I can’t won’t put that one on the Internet. The latest picture is taken at an odd angle. I think she’s trying to show me her new “tramp stamp” tattoo, but all I can think is there has to be a better angle than that — one that’ll show more ass, and make the ‘too easier to see. What? I’m a jerk because I wanna see more ass? Here’s a closer shot of the tattoo

I can’t help but think my friend could make some money with her camera phone. I’m sure this is not an original idea, but she could have people subscribe for a monthly fee, and send pictures out via MMS. She doesn’t have to be the subject all the time. She could get some of her hot chick friends in on it, too.

Anyway, I hope she doesn’t stop sending me these pictures just because I posted a couple to my blog. I made sure her identity was masked. The only way you’d recognize her is if you seen her with her pants off… Umm, maybe I shouldn’t post these… Nah!