What A Fucking Waste Of Time

“Quick question, how long does it take to blow a pig?”

This is a picture of Steve, one of my co-workers, petting an inflatable pig… which is something you don’t see every day.

I’m not sure I can explain this one, but I’ll try. Today is the last day of another co-worker, DJ, who’s moving to Arkansas to go to school. We’ve been teasing him relentlessly about Arkansas. You know, jokes about farm animals, family trees that don’t branch, low IQs, etc. (Arkansas: 2.6 million people, 9 last names) So, at a small going away celebration, we had cake and DJ was given a gift; an inflatable pig. It wasn’t long before a message came across the jabber server; “DJ is blowing his pig!”

The pig doll is kind of cute, in an inflatable Goatse sort of way… which of course isn’t cute at all. Yes, it’s got a gaping… hole… under it’s tail. The eyelids of the pig are droopy, I guess to give the illusion that the pig is enjoying its owner’s… attention. The only thing that could make this thing any funnier is to have it “squeal.”

Anyway, everyone at work wishes DJ well at school in Arkansas. Word of advice though, DJ… make sure you keep your shoes tied when carrying that pig around. You wouldn’t want to trip and fall on it. It won’t look too good if you’re seen bouncing up and down on an inflatable pig.